First day of school, it’s gonna be grand, and a good breakfast starts with… dark chocolate-covered espresso beans!
Ten years later, it’s all the same really. I don’t feel as old as I look to the 20-year olds in the class, although I did ask my coworker what to wear in order to not look like a “non-trad.” Then it occurred to me that only a true “non-trad” would even consider asking that question. So with worries about parking and finding my classroom, and determined to fly under the radar, I headed out for Day 1 of my pursuit of teacher licensure and master’s degree. Outfit: shorts, flip-flops, t-shirt, zip up hoodie. It’s the best I could do and how I always dress anyway, so it seemed the best choice. Be yourself, don’t bring your coffee, was the advice I got from my peers. Hence the espresso beans. Portable cool kid caffeine, since I don’t drink Amp! Or Monster! Or whatever that crap the kids like is. Oops, or you know, something less old-lady sounding. I don’t go in for the power drinks there Sonny, my ticker can’t take it.
There are a few differences between being a student now vs. then. I don’t give as much thought to the $5 parking fee. Back when I was in school as an undergrad, my paycheck covered my rent and bills with about $30/week leftover for food, clothes, movies, etc. Luckily I worked in a restaurant/bakery where the leftover food was free (I really can live on cherry turnovers and baguettes and be very happy. Fat and happy.), and where the tip jar provided an average of $10-$12 spending money at the end of each shift. Would I have used half of my cash for parking back then? No way. Five dollars could buy a Frontier breakfast burrito and fresh-squeezed orange juice, or a latte and green chile bagel at Fred’s. So back then I roller bladed to school to save on parking money. This time I considered parking far away for free and skating, but the traffic and extreme downhill grade of the trip made me opt out of that plan. I thought about death and how much I’d miss my people and leaving the parenting responsibility solely to Heather and how lonely it must be in Heaven with all those do-gooder, God and Peter (isn’t he the saint who lets you in?) suck ups and how sad I’d be once they found out I didn’t really belong and that I was just a good bullshitter and send me to Hell where I really ought to be and where I’m sure people are singing really bad karaoke all the time and the dude in charge (okay, fine, Satan if you want) is making people eat cottage cheese and drink crappy, weak, lukewarm coffee. I thought about road rash, which I already know from past experience hurts like Hell, and frankly, I shallowly thought about the undesirability of arriving to class all sweaty. Maybe it’s not so shallow, maybe it’s being kind to my fellow classmates. So five dollars seems a good trade off for the alternative above-mentioned options.
On studying: there is no waiting until the last minute, and there will be no all-nighters. It will be a little-snippets-of-time kind of deal, just the same as it is for writing. As far as the all-nighters go, I really hate them and they make me an emotional jerk to be around. So I am at least for now not planning any of that. For only one class, there most likely won’t be a need for that much studying. I do have two papers to write, and I had the completely nerdy, non-traddy thought that 6-10 pages double-spaced is not enough to say everything I need to say.
Amidst all my worry about clothes and parking and flying under the radar, I did have a moment, after I was verified to actually be enrolled in the class, of complete excitement that I finally made it here. It’s like when you are finally getting clicked into the roller coaster after waiting in the long line in the hot sun, and the excitement of the moment surges through your body. You know, right before you realize that it’s a big mistake and you are way too old to ride something called V2 and you hope you don’t puke or piss your pants or die because the shoulder harness thing pops open when you are 185 feet up. Okay, well, school is nothing like that. It’s going to be fine.
