Suddenly my life got very crowded. My brain is filled with unattractive facts of history that make me feel ashamed of our collective past. My work is full of panic over a new program called SAP, and everyone jockeying for their strategic position. I’m not much for corporate jockeying. My home is now one big person, two little people and one small dog more crowded than it was 3 weeks ago. But it’s Fall, football season, and time to bake and make homemade noodles. My history paper is nearly done because I am a super student nerd, and life is still as good as ever. Studying the Great Depression reminds me how lucky I am to have a house to offer, to be able to buy food for my family, and to have a paycheck. And so often I think being surrounded by people is a better option than being alone.
Sometimes when the crowds get to me, I go back in my mind to Angwin, California. I’m at my aunt and uncle’s house, with the beautiful garden, infinity pool, and the perfect guest house that feels like a cabin and retreat. There I am on the bocce ball court, I have a glass of wine in my left hand and the pallino in my right. There is my uncle, giving me advice on how to throw, and behind him is my aunt, smiling behind her own glass of wine. I can smell the citronella in the air, the temperature is perfect, I am barefoot and the dirt court feels so good on my feet. An owl hoots and the score doesn’t matter. The plan for tomorrow is a morning walk, a lot of swimming and a little Pacifico with lime. I am enveloped in a hug of summer, relaxation and love of my family and the people who love me best. I wish the moment could go on forever, but even the memory of it alleviates the crowds in my life and in my head.
Short post, go to your happy place.
2 Comments
September 13, 2009 at 8:24 pm
Nice.
September 14, 2009 at 2:03 am